Flufferwump the story part 3: Wumperfluff

Michael was realised from the medical ward later that day after Nurse Grampet, a giant cube of a woman with a giant hariy mole above her lip, had forced him to eat “2 bowls of delicious Gruel”. As he walked away Michael was doing everything he could to keep the Gruel down, but his mind was filled with questions. Had that really happened? Had he met Flufferwump? And was this honey as good as it tasted?

Michael decided that he would hide it under his pillow and try a finger full tonight before he went to bed. Now however it was time for toy making shop. He had slept through all of his lessons and homework time. This could be the greatest day ever. Whoop! He walked as slowly as he felt he could get away with towards the toy shop. He reached the large blue door and pushed it open slowly.  In hindsight the fact the door was left ajar should have been a warning, but Michaels’s mind was elsewhere. When the bucket landed on his head and the sticky glue started to drip down over his face and shoulders. He reached up and lifted the bucket off his head just in time to see all the sawdust blowing towards him powered by the electric fan that is used to quickly set the glue. The peels of laughter followed Michael out of the workshop towards the showers.

Michael left the showers about an hour later, red raw from all the scrubbing needed to remove the glue and wood shavings. He found himself with a spare 10 minutes before all the others came up to the dorm room for lightsout. He reached under his pillow and pulled out the jar of bright yellow honey. He slowly popped open the lid of the honey. Immdediately he could smell the most wonderous thing he had ever smelt. It was like flowers and sugar and chocolate brownies. It smelled of Flufferwump land. He stuck his finger into the sticky gooey mess, a lot like the glue he had been covered in earlier and brought it out to his mouth. He allowed the tip of his tongue to touch the honey and immediately his senses were on fire. Every colour was more vivid, every sound was louder and clearer, even the rough woolen sheets felt softer. All of a sudden he felt very tired. He replaced the lid and hod the jar under his pillow and then lay down.

He woke back up in the same field as before but something was different. Something felt a little off. He looked around and all the colours seemed to have dimmed a little and there was a green fog lying close to the ground. And there was a smell. It smelt of rotten eggs, gone off turnips and generally everything that smells bad. It was bringing a tear to Michaels eye. He looked around to try to find the res road, but spotted a shadow coming out of mist from behind a tree. It moved with a strange hopping motion. It looked vaguely like a triangle. “Flufferwump?” called out Michael, although his voice sounded funny as he was holding his nose. He walked towards the skipping shadow.

Eventually he got close enough to make out the shadow. “Flufferwump. Wow I thought it was all a dream then I found the honey. I tried some before bed and then…..” Michael trialed off as he noticed that the colouring was wrong. Flufferwump had been purple with green spots, but this creature dancing in front of him was green with purple spots.

“I’m not Flufferwump but your close. My name is Wumperfluff and I am Flufferwump’s twin brother.”

“Oh hello. How are you? Will you come with me to see Flufferwump?”

“Oh you won’t find Flufferwump. I’ve had enough of his mime artistry for a live time. I’ve hidden him away somewhere so he cannot interrupt my plans to take over the world!” With that there was a loud rumble like thunder emenating from Humperfluff and s pout a vile smelling green smoke billowed from his bottom.

“Haa haa haa. My plan is working. If I can’t scare everyone away I will smoke them out!”

That was when Michael started to run. Partly from fear, partly from the horrible smell. Then he remembered. The red road only goes to one place. The place you need to be. JHe made a dash for the red road and had to duck out of the way as Humperfluff made a grab for his pyjama top. As he hit the red road he continued to run in the only direction it went. After a few minutes Michael came to a cave, and the road stopped. It was dark inside and Michael didn’t like the dark at all. But he knew that this where he had to go. He carefully creeped inside. It was cold and damp inside, and he could hear a strange scuffling noise. This made him even more afraid. After a couple of minutes of stepping slowly he came into a large cavern. In the middle of the cavern he could see a small triangle shape slumped over. “Flufferwump?”

“Yes who is that? Is that you again Humperfluff. Let me go!”

“No Flufferwump it is me Michael” He said with relief as he ran towards Flufferwump. When he got there he could see that Flufferwump was chained to the floor. “Who is Humperfluff?”

“Ah that is a long story, but I will give you the short version. He is my twin. As we grew up I realised I was a talented mime artist and became world famous. I even managed to pull the Eiffel tower to Paris from Brussels with an invisible mime rope.” Michael looked at him as if he had lost his marbles “What like a little statue thing of the Eiffel tower and what is mime rope?”

“No Michael” replied Flufferwump “The actually Eiffel tower and everyone knows what a mime rope is. Mime’s use it all the time to pull heavy objects. Well I digress. Well Humperfluff wanted to be a spy and went to spy school and everything. The only problem was his special talent got in the way.”

“And what was it?” Asked Michael excitedly

“Well when he gets excited he, well, flootie-diddles”

“He whats?”

“Ermmm Whiz bangs”

“Eh?”

“Bottom burps, fluffy-lumps, hind hurrumphs!. He farts Michael. And it stinks. Well you can’t be a spy if you keep giving yourself away. And no-one wants you around if everytime you play a game you let out such a horrible smell that everyone collapses”

“Oh dear. Yes I’ve smelt one. Its horrid. The whole field I came in on was covered in a green mist. He said he wanted everyone to leave so he could take over the land”

“Ah typical, once a spy, now a super villain. It was him who left the smoke machine for the bees as well. An early model of his fart machine. I think he meant for the bees to leave so the Gummi bears would scare everyone away.”

“Yes he said as much”

“OK then, so how are you going to get me out of these chains?”

Michael took a look a look at the chains and gave them a prod.

“Well there is good and bad news” said Michael “It appears the cahins are made out of liquorice, and I can eat my way through them. The problem is the only time I had liquorice I hated it”  Michael however started away at the chains. They tasted almost as bad as the school Gruel, and made his teeth stick together, but eventually he got through them.

“Yay “ exclaimed Flufferwump, “I’m free. Michale you’re a star oww, oww, owww, owww”.

Michael stared at Flufferwump trying to wonder what why he was crying out in pain, then realised that Flufferwump hard started to clap for Michael feeing him, giving himself 2 black eyes in the process.

“Right lets get out of here” Flufferwump said once he blinked his hands a couple of times. They both walked towards the entrance of the cave. As they got close they could here a strange laughing sound. “Wait here and I will take a look” said Flufferwump.

He walked to the entrace to the cave and slowly extended his arm so his right eye was looking out of the cave. “Oh no its Humperfluff. What shall we do?”

“Hello Flufferwump. I can see your eye. It appears that that strange boy has managed to free you then. Well no matter. Since I met him on the field I have been storing up for a mega Wumperfluff special that will seal you in that cave forever. And the smell will be so bad, that no one will come to visit you. Mwah haa haa”

Michael and Flufferwump both came out of the cave to face Humperfluff who was now looking a little uncomfortable as he hopped from one foot to the other.

“I have an idea” said Michael, as he saw a strange looking pink stone on the floor, “when I same now distract him”

Flufferwump nodded that he understood. Humperfluff came dancing over to the cave and turned around so his back was showing. “Now” said Michael. Flufferwump jumperout in front of Humperfluff and started to silently drive a bus, letting passengers on and off

“Arghhh, stop, there is no bus and no people. It makes no sense”

Michael dived for the strange stone and realised it was quite soft. It rem inded him of a marshmallow that someone had given him once as a birthday present. Without thinking he pushed the Marshmallow rock into Humperfluff’s back where the green gas had come from before.

“Now is your time to know how it feels. Haa haa haa.” And with that Humperfluff strained and strained. But nothing happened. “What is going on? Oh no” Humperluff said in a panic as he started to swell and his feet left the ground. He carried on swelling and floating up into the air. When he get to 5 m off the floor the Marshmallow rock gave way and with a loud crack fired off behind HumperFluff. Now lots of scientists in the past have described that every action must have an equal and opposite reaction, and this situation was no different. A Jet of green gas flew from the back of Humperfluff as he flew off at high speed into the far distance.

“Wow Michael. That was quick thinking. Twice now you have saved us here. Why don’t you take another of those rocks with you as a souvenier. I can see you fading. I am sure we will see you again soooooonnnn”.

And with that Michael again woke up, back in his own bed with his face in the smelly armpit of orangutan of a human, preparing himself for another dutchoven.